I’m finding it difficult to share these days because frankly it’s not that much fun telling my story right now. But the isolation is worse so here goes…

It’s been 4 weeks now since we became unexpectedly homeless. (The short version of that if you missed it is that my kids’ dad lost his job and unexpectedly stopped paying any child support at the same time that my car broke down repeatedly and my hours got cut back at work.) It hasn’t all been easy, but it’s a very privileged version of homelessness. Richard and I have a full size bed in our van and thanks to all the great people we know, we have had a great place to park with access to a bathroom, bathtub, laundry, a fridge, and a big patio area. We also have a beach day pass that gives us all day parking and showers.

We also have a beautiful Airstream camper available to us that is going to serve us well and some wonderful friends are helping us get it moved to Long Beach from Joshua Tree in two more weeks! We are still on the lookout for a long term place to park the Airstream. I think we will be ok where we are for a few more weeks before we wear out our welcome with our gracious hosts.

Nadia and Brooke have had to spend extra time with their dad while we wait for the Airstream to get here. We did get to have them with us for four days last week thanks to another earth angel couple who let us invade their guest room for a few nights. This whole thing has been pretty tough for the girls of course, but they are strong and resilient. They’re getting through it.

Richard and I have been applying for lots of jobs but have not had much luck so far. (Things move slowly when projectors are trying to initiate.) I know there is something out there where I can be valued for my wisdom and experience even though I’ve spent most of the past decade “out of the workforce” and I’m calling it in! I also applied for CalWorks and Calfresh and am waiting to hear back. I have little hope of getting any child support again. The kids’ Dad is pretty unstable at this point and last I heard he’s not even looking for work anymore as he and his friend have decided to start a business.

The kids have been without medical insurance since Aug 1. I tried to apply for Medi-Cal for them but couldn’t because I’m not the one who claims them as tax dependents. I have tried four times to communicate with their Dad about getting Medi-Cal or coverage through Covered California and each time he has either changed the subject, gone on the attack, or refused to answer. I am beginning to suspect that he is intentionally keeping Nadia uninsured so that she can’t move forward with her gender transition.

The lawyer that offered to take our case pro bono has a busier case load than she had anticipated and isn’t sure how much she can help now. She said she would help with some requests for court orders but is taking a long time to respond on everything because she’s so busy. I feel like I may need to move forward without her but I am not sure how.

This morning I got a message from the girls’ Dad saying he can’t keep them this week because he has job interviews in Northern California. I dont know if this is true or just his latest attempt to make my life difficult but I dont know what I’m going to do. I have nowhere for them to stay this week and there isn’t room for all of us in the van. The Airstream doesn’t get here for two more weeks. And wherever we stay, we still have to get up before dawn every weekday morning to get them to two different schools 40 min away in Anaheim Hills. Even though their Dad is in Long Beach too now. It’s just ridiculous.

We may just have to pull the girls out of school for the week and go stay with Richard’s grandma in Morrow Bay. I hate to disrupt their lives even more, but otherwise I think we’re looking at homeless shelters and I don’t think that’s better for them.

Does anyone have room in their yard where we could pitch a tent for a week? Or some couch/floor space where my girls could sleep for part of this coming week? I know it’s a big ask. We will find a way to pay forward all the kindness we are receiving.

I’m doing my best to stay positive and trust that everything will work out. Some days the feelings of defeat win out, but not every day. Little by little I am making my way out of this storm.

Huge thank you’s to all the amazing friends who are helping this feel more like an adventure than an ordeal! Shannon Salonga, Catharine Dada, Stephan Dada, Catherine Evan’s, Teri Colette, Robert Jecmen, Amy Lee, April O’Brien, Missy Carter, Emily Mattek, and Yve Hart to name a few.

Please send love and light and hold a vision of my family living in peace, balance, love, abundance, and trust.